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系列心理健康公益讲座 1/25: 情感管理的成熟 (音频+文字)

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发表于 2020-10-10 01:13:05 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式


喜马拉雅链接 [url]http://xima.tv/7yGvfz?_sonic=0[/url]


情商上的成长是可以一生持续实践的,怎么做到理解自己, 爱护自己理解别人,帮助别人是情绪调节和管理的重点
Some key conceptions from Leslie Potter’s speech and beyond
(Happily Family Conference 2020)
1.          Emotional maturity: seeing, hearing, understanding, and being able to manage our emotional world.
2.      It is cultural based.
3.      Young kids—teaching about physical skills (e.g. how to tie the shoelace, how to cook, how to do maths etc.), but seldom on emotional regulation
4.      We teach kids the negative feelings, actually we should not call them negative feelings, they are difficult feelings
5.      Our feelings come from our internal experiences, it is about POWER
6.      Someone causes me to feel negatively v.s. someone triggers me to feel negatively
7.      Rejected and abundant (feel being rejected or I am a rejected person or act as a rejected person), feeling or cognition, that means to feel things or to be things
8.      Effective self care vs effective selfish, self view vs others’ view
9.      Healthy boundary, make my needs as important balanced with other’s needs
10.  The parents have limits and boundaries, therefore the parents request the kids to have limits and boundaries
11.  Kids desire many things based on their growth. As parents, how we can feed these desires, how to teach kids about the negative (difficult) feelings and how to cope with rejected and abandoned feelings (cognitions)
12.  Self aggression, self blaming
13.   Unconsciousness of stories of lacking some things, lack of control
14.  Self hit-to control, hit by others-cannot control
15.  Disrespected, powerless
16.  Attunement
17.  There is no way to say “allow them to feel negatively” because they do feel negatively
18.  Powerless thoughts but powerful behaviours, or vice versa
19.  Resilience, adaptability, we maybe not agree the negative feeling, but we can manage (control) the them, Do not feel FAIL IT
20.  Secondary feeling, primary feeling,
  
莱斯利·波特的演讲重要概念和其他延申知识点
(2020年幸福家庭研讨会)
1.情绪管理的成熟:看到,聆听,理解并能够管理(眼耳鼻舌身意)我们的情感世界。
2.它是基于文化的。
3.年幼的孩子--教物理技能(如何系鞋带,做饭,如何做数学等),但很少涉及情感规范
4.我们教孩子们负面情绪,实际上我们不应该称他们为负面情绪,他们是困难情绪
5.我们的感受来自我们的内部经验,这与决定力程度有关
6.有人导致我对我感到负面(困难)情感  有人刺激到让我想起消极情感和认知
7.被拒绝和抛弃(感觉被拒绝,或者我是一个被拒绝的人,或者作为被拒绝的人),感觉或认知,意味着感觉到某种情感或成为那个标定的人
8.有效的自我爱护vs有效的“自私“,自我观感与他人的观感
9.健康的界限,使我的需求与他人的需求保持平衡
10.父母有限度和界限,因此父母要求孩子有限度和界限
11.孩子们根据自己的成长渴望很多东西。作为父母,我们如何满足这些愿望,如何教理解孩子负面(困难)的感受,以及如何应对被拒绝和被抛弃的感觉(认知)
12.自我伤害(广义自残),自责
13.对往事的记忆,已经在意识里有了缺乏的意识,无法掌控
14.打自己可控制,打他人无法控制
15.不尊重,无决定力
16.协同
17. 没有办法说“允许他们感到消极”,因为他们确实感到消极,不允许也会感觉。
18.没有决定力的想法,但有决定力的行为,反之亦然
19.韧性 (逆向力),适应性,我们可能不愿意负面的感觉,但是我们可以管理(控制)它们, 不要觉得失败
20.继发的感觉,源头的感觉





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